Friday, October 19, 2007

M&M's

I just found an m&m sitting by the computer, a sweet comforting present. A comfort like my friends MJ, Geneva (and chocolate) talking me through a half of a heart break. It's only half because I didn't give my whole heart away - or should I say I retrieved it back on his step several weeks ago (a symbolic story). This morning the guy I've been seeing decided he just wanted to be friends after a suspicious moment reported to me from an outside source. So was he? Probably, which means I'm a whole lot better off. In my head I'm reminding myself of our differences which were rather wide and remember the questions as to 'why'. Knowing he was an important part in opening my door, helps. At least I keep telling myself I know something so much more deeper, and richer (and no I don't necessarily mean monitary wise), is on it's way. This is a time I miss being in the presence of my friends. I know they're with me but it's not the same as the good ole 'girlfriend time.'

On the reality day to day stuff: Susan has gotten assistant manager and is doing a bang up job. I'm proud of her for taking that step. She's been the mother hen, and actually done more cooking then me. Wow what a switch. Me I'm in a supervisor position at the front desk, which is going pretty good so far. I'm down another size and have claimed 2 pairs of jeans Susan doesn't wear; I have to admit my ass looks pretty damned good. The adjustment of being in a larger place is okay, it's nice having more space, a kitchen and a larger bathroom. It just happens to be next door to the guy I no longer see (haha), and it's noisy sometimes. I seem to go through this funk missing my old apartment at each place we live in, but this too shall pass; we'll make it home, decorate it good, and make good memories here. The weather is so beautiful, nice during the day, cold at night and the canyon is still magnificent. I find comfort with its presence, its ever changing moods; yet always constant in beauty and its sense of self. A lesson I'm abosorbing from the magnificence gifted to me in my placement here. For that and much more I am grateful.

2 comments:

Mom and Nana, I am both! said...

His Loss little sister, I am here for you and the Girls gone wide :) are always with you, I am so proud of you!!!! ALWAYS.

Thank You for your confidence in me :)

I Love You!!!!!!!

Terry said...

your words are correct this too shall pass. I have to remind myself of your words.Congrads to Susan glad you both are doing well. I can't even imagen how beautiful the place is, and IM the same way, I get in funk and I think it is common.
Hopefully we can make a vist some day.