Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Living life. External confirmation vs internal acceptance conscious responsibility for one's own emotional reactions.

Instead of "he/she made me...(fill in the dots), I remind myself "I chose to..." no need to justify it; it is what it is...a choice. Whether it feels like a choice or not, that is what it is

In the movie "The Devil Wears Prada", Ann Hathorn's character is given the choice (presented as otherwise), to take a trip to Paris in place of the one who had been planning and counting on it. Though it wasn't presented as a choice, with Meryl Streep's character telling her she's going to Paris but she had to tell the other girl that she wouldn't be. Not much of a choice is it? It was one of those 'or quit' choice but a choice just the same. The situation became one that covers up that grey area of integrity then steps over the line. That point comes to light later in the movie in the car after a dinner in Paris. I recommend seeing it.

Eleanor Roosevelt said (and I'm sure I'm para phrasing), "no one can make you feel bad without your consent".

So when I feel ashamed, stupid or guiltly it's usually me making it external. I was treated... instead I need to change that to I chose to accept that behavior....

A lesson my sister wrote about 'it's easy'. Until one becomes comfortable with trying or doing something new it will leave it's own effect on us that we give it. I know that if something is easy to someone else and not to me, I could be making it more detailed then it either needs to be OR my detailedness will take it further in the expression of what I'm doing.